Last Updated: 7/10/2020 | July 10th, 2020
“Where should I go?” is a question I frequently ask myself.
Wanting to escape the oppressive summer heat of Austin, I’ve spent the last few months staring at a map but unable to answer that question. I’ve toyed with the idea of heading to Madagascar, Hawaii, Malta, Kenya, the Caribbean, the Maldives, Dubai, or Sri Lanka.
And, because I couldn’t choose and was so afraid to commit, it wasn’t until this week I finally decided where I would finally go….two weeks from now.
Why?
I was suffering from what psychologists call “choice overload.”
Choice overload occurs when we have too many choices available to us. We get decision fatigue and go with the default option thus avoiding making a decision altogether. We are sometimes so paralyzed by the fear of making the wrong choice that they don’t make any choice.
Think of standing in the cereal aisle. We have all these options right in front of us, but we keep going back to our old favorite, Fruity Pebbles. (Or, Cinnamon Toast Crunch if we’re feeling crazy!)
We may want to try something new, but we can’t figure out what we want the most — there are just too many options! How do we choose? How do we know we won’t make the wrong choice? So, paralyzed with indecision, we go back to what we know. And, if we don’t have a favorite, often we just choose what is popular and familiar to our mind (Cheerios).
In psychology, this is called “analysis paralysis.” Contemplating our options becomes such a taxing mental burden that we don’t make a decision. Our minds want shortcuts. It’s how we process all the information thrown at us each day. It’s too difficult to think about every simple decision all the time. Going with what you know and is familiar is how we shortcut our analysis paralysis. (This is all explained in the 2004 book The Paradox of Choice, which I highly recommend reading.)
Think of the world as the proverbial cereal aisle. We’re looking forward to picking a cereal (a destination), but suddenly realize we have too many options. Faced with so many choices and without a strong opinion (e.g., I really want to go to Thailand this fall!), we stare blankly, wondering if picking a destination is the right choice, so we end up (a) fretting about it for months like I did, missing flight deals and precious planning time or (b) end up with what is big, popular, and familiar (let’s just visit Paris for the tenth time!).
Whether we have two weeks, two months, or two years, deciding where to go is the hardest part of travel. Once you have the time, picking the destination becomes a task of whittling down a long list of “must-see” destinations.
I often get so paralyzed by choice that I don’t book a trip until the last minute, and even then, I often suffer from buyer’s remorse. Did I really want to book that flight to Dubai? Or should I have gone to Madagascar instead? If I do this trip, will I have time to visit Peru later this year, or should I just go to Peru now?
Last week, after months of fretting, I finally bit the bullet and booked tickets to Dubai, the Maldives, and Sri Lanka. As much as I’m excited about this trip, but in the back of my mind, I still find myself thinking, “Is 15 days really enough to enjoy Sri Lanka? Maybe I should go somewhere else until I can spend more time there.”
Of course, when I get to where I’m going all of that second-guessing melts away and I have the time of my life.
If you’re a long-term traveler, you can go anywhere for as long as you want. But when you only have a limited amount of time — because you’re like me and slowing down, or because you just have a few weeks off from work and need to make the most of them — you have to be more selective.
So how do you narrow down your destinations, get on with your trip planning, and not suffer the anxiety that comes with choice overload?
This experience has given me a new philosophy on trip planning. I’ve changed how I decide on destinations:
First, embrace variety. You’re always going to be overwhelmed by choice. There will always be more destinations to visit than you have time to see. The list of places to visit will only get longer the more you travel, not shorter. Don’t fight it. Recognize it and don’t let it control you.
Second, start with a list of ten places you want to visit. Come up with the destinations that are at the top of your mind. This year, now that I am taking fewer trips, I want my trips to be to places I’ve never been and are as culturally different as possible, so I came up with the list at the top of this blog (yes, I know not all of the places are culturally different from each other).
Third, figure out when you can go and how long you have. For me, I knew I had exactly a month as I have to be stateside for weddings in September and October.
Fourth, think of the time of year. Which country has the weather you want to enjoy the most? I’m trying to escape the heat of inland Austin, so I wanted beaches. I crossed Hawaii and the Caribbean off the list as I wanted something more exotic. The Maldives and Sri Lanka may be hot, but they have beaches.
Fifth, make the length of your travels proportional to the size of the country. I didn’t want to attempt to visit large countries like India, Brazil, or China when I have just a few weeks. I wanted to see smaller destinations that I could explore more in-depth during a shorter period of time. By this point, I knew I was down to using Dubai as a hub and finding destinations from there.
Finally, look up flights. From Dubai, it was $1,700 USD to Madagascar but $400 to the Maldives, and, thanks to airline miles. $0 to get to and from Sri Lanka. I didn’t have enough points to fly on the African carriers I wanted so Madagascar and Kenya were out of the question.
That left the Maldives and Sri Lanka as the best places to visit from Dubai.
And, with that, where I’m going was settled.
Once I stopped letting too much choice keep me from making a decision and after logically going through my checklist, I stopped hemming and hawing about where I wanted to go, found my destinations, booked my trip, and got on with getting excited about visiting new places.
Overcoming choice overload in travel is about first realizing that there will always be more places to visit than you have time, then figuring out what destinations fit what you can do right now. Once you start with your list of destinations, getting down to the perfect one becomes a process of elimination.
There will always be too many destinations to choose from and too little time to see them in.
But, at the very least, we can finally break our analysis paralysis.
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Natalie
I’m really glad it’s a normal and common problem because I’m feeling that way even with just daydreaming about destinations.
I remember reading an article about decision fatigue. It was an intriguing read.
Maria
Amazing write! Choosing a right destination according to the budget and season is truly a difficult task but your tips are very helpful.
Its human nature that everybody needs change and if we are spending money we always need to explore something different. And sometimes seeking change in particular destination is very confusing for some people.
Jeff
This is helpful advice! I’ve suffered from analysis paralysis many times and just ended up making no choice at all. You are right though, when you arrive at your destination, you can live in the moment and not worry you made the wrong choice. I find it helpful to book things last minute that way I can intentionally narrow down my options based on availability and affordability.
Bob Weisenberg
Yes, I’ve got that problem right now. My wife and I are going to live in SE Asia for six month starting in November, starting with two months in Hong Kong. After that ??? Probably Chiang Mai and Penang . (We like cities near mountains and we like to settle down for 1-3 months at a time. We prefer to live in one place rather than try to “see a country”.)
But while Iike Chiang Mai and Penang, I’m consumed with the fear of missing something else I’d like better. So I’m googling all over the place and reading article after article. Eventually I just have to accept that I can’t be all knowing and just go with my current best gut choices.
As you say, once you settle on a place and get on with it, it usually works out great in the end. So far, so good. In the last two years we’ve lived in Italy (Pallanza), Ecuador (Cuenca), Peru (Cusco), Spain (Malaga), Dominican Republic (Las Terrenas), Norway (Bergen), and now Scotland (Peebles). We’ve liked them all so far!
Bob W.
Katie
I am having that problem at the moment! I have two months and will either go to Patagonia or India. Patagonia was all set but will money being a bit tight, I am leaning more towards India. So hard to choose! I think I will be heading to the Maldives and Sri Lanka for about a month in June next year so I am looking forward to hearing about your experience there 🙂
Emily
I think I have the opposite of choice paralysis – I just book the first thing that gets me excited! 🙂
Stephanie Craig
I start with flights (points or skyskanner) and then go from there. Since that’s usually the biggest part of my budget, if I can get that under a set amount or free, then the planning just flies.
Unless I’m planning a girls vacation with friends, then it’s forty-five emails and texts before we can even pick a region of the world…
Diane
Omg…this is the story of my life…and not just about where to go, but what hotel to stay in (or B&B or Airbnb or ??), what restaurants to eat at, where to shop and what bars to hit. Then it’s what activities to plan….and on and on. Seriously you can spend countless hours searching for the perfect place. Great advice and I will be using alot ot these tips!
Brooke
Haaaahahaha this is SO me! In fact, as someone who’s feeling “middle age” (especially dealing with chronic illness), I was recently thinking about the number of summers I have left to travel and nearly cried from the depression! How ridiculous is that? 😀
Some people buy a sports car in their mid-life crisis… I add to my destination list…
Anyway, yes, as another commenter put it: I try to sit down and logic my way through which one works best right now, etc etc. And, which destination is most likely to change in the near future. (often, which is likely to become more touristy in a bad way? I’ll go there first, while it’s more untouched!)
Hooray for kindred spirits!
Sarah
Yeah, my fiance and I totally had this issue when trying to plan a trip this summer, compounded by delaying talking about making plans for a variety of reasons. Once we actually started, I basically said “I want to go everywhere, but here are 5 general places I want to go that would be good for this summer.” General = Spain, but not even specific cities. He chose Spain (and Barcelona specifically) because he’d been there before and knew some of the things to do, because he thought a month was too little time to plan a week-long trip. While I do wish we had had more time to plan (although honestly in part just for the anticipation of it), I think if you’re visiting major European cities (which was entirely what my original list of 5 was based on), then you really don’t actually need to do a whole lot of planning. There’s so much to do everywhere, and when you’re planning to spend only 2-4 days in any one place the issue, even with minimal research ahead of time, is figuring out what you don’t have time for! Plus, travel logistics are easy in Europe, so planning for that is easy too. I’m hoping to get 1-2 more big trips planned before the start of next summer too, and now intend to start planning those as soon as we get back from this trip!
Pami
We had that problem too. We put all the letters in a hat and have drawn one. It was H. So, it has to be one of the countries that begins with H (which we had not visited yet 😉 ) . What about Honduras ? being honest – we would never have thought about Honduras ! and… it was one of our best vacations ! Sometimes is good to let fate decide.
Erica
I love this check list! Although, I tend to look up flights earlier. The cheaper, the better. I hate whittling it down to my top choice only to find out that it’s the most expensive time to fly there!
Matt, these tips are golden. Thanks!
Harsha & Anuradha
Oh I totally understand the “analysis paralysis.” I have had this for ages. I have used similar tips to come out of the endless loop of fidgeting.
I personally liked your tip: “make the length of your travels proportional to the size of the country”. Its obvious but not everybody would think through this.
Bill
Glad to hear there are other persons with the same problem ..
Very helpful article.
Thanks!
Belle
These are incredible tips and I wish to add my own to the list as well. I came up with these years ago when I first started traveling extensively and struggled with picking a destination. I hope it helps someone the way it helped me 😀
– Name your budget: If you have $2000 to spend on everything (flight, food, accommodation, etc.) chances are you won’t get far if your destination is pricey (for example Switzerland). If you have limited funds, it’s best to avoid ridiculously pricey destinations till you gain some insights on how to travel for less. A quick search on the most expensive travel destinations will come in handy and eliminate destinations that will leave you dry in a whim!
– What intrigues you the most (hobbies and interest): You don’t go to Sweden for its beaches nor Thailand for its skyscrapers. So it’s good to know in advance if your destination has some of the things you enjoy or some of the things you wish to try.
– Pick a continent first, country second: With roughly 200 countries in the world, it’s a real nightmare to try and narrow down from the list where to go at any given time . So pick a continent (possibly one that you fancy the most or curious about the most) then research which countries in that continent are big on some of your hobbies/interests and (or) things you want to try. For example, if you love art, cheese, museums, etc, some of the countries that will pop up if you base your search on Europe includes: France, Italy, Spain, etc. If you love wildlife and base your search on Africa, prime destination such as Kenya will pop up. Simple searches like this eliminates a lot of unnecessary results that sometimes make tough decisions even tougher.
– Research your destination and ask questions if you are unsure about anything especially pertaining to a norm. Don’t be that individual who shows up somewhere uninformed thinking you will change the place just like that or disrespect a community out of ignorance or arrogance. It’s great to challenge yourself but don’t do so at the expense of putting yourself at unnecessary risks. If you are sincerely not open to a particular view, religion, culture, then it’s best you avoid the destination altogether, prepare yourself to embrace the change/ask those who have been there for their input.
– Ultimately, make your selections based on your OWN desires, intuition and so on instead of basing it on other people’s stories, movies, news, etc. Yes, it’s important to take all these factors into consideration but ultimately, your travel has to be about you and for you so you can gain your own knowledge and experience, form your own opinions and overall, create your own memories.
Martina
I absolutely agree with you – too many choices are a REAL problem. We now live in Northern Peru and our biggest supermarket would more be like a little shop in the States, but at least you don’t have the choice problem. You take what they have, what you need and don’t waste time over which cereal would suit you this week 🙂
Your tips for choosing a destination are just perfect. And then sometimes you just have to take a decision.
Leanne
So true, picking one is hard! I’ve wanted to go to Cuba as an American ever since the border opened up for us to get there legally. Unfortunately I’m in Honolulu so flights to there are hard to come by. When I first looked the “cheapest” flight was $1,500. After several months I found some for $400-$500 which was much better. Another problem, I was thinking of going there just for a weekend but it takes 24+ hours to fly there from Honolulu! One flight had four layovers, four! One to Los Angeles, then to Mexico City, then to Cancun, to Mexico City (again), and then to Havana. It’s just not going to happen. Now I should find another option, I’m thinking Fiji. I looked up flights, $350 and it only takes like 3 hours of flight.
Amy Pelham
These are some great tips! I’m feeling analysis paralysis on experiences to do first. Should I go to Oktoberfest next year or Burning Man? With limited time off and a small budget, it’s not feasible to do everything at once. Thanks for sharing!
Janice
I normally find I have no plans and then a bunch come along all at once. Kind of like this year, I had no plans for the end of the year and now it looks like I am visiting 5 countries in a 3 month period. One of those happens to be Sri Lanka so I look forward to hearing about your experiences.
Scott
Matt,
Great post! It’s shocking how difficult it can be to decide when the options are limitless. My wife and I struggled for months last year on where to live for 2 months. We had narrowed down our options to Buenos Aires or Bali, two dramatically different options. After months of deliberation we decided on Buenos Aires.
Scott
Patricia Gaekwad
I love traveling and have been super inspired by your blog. It’s lovely to see such passion and the wealth of information provided. Finally decided to start my travel blog; contributing in my own little way to this wonderful blogging community.
Connie
Great read & advice, Matt! What a horrible problem to have, huh? We are all so lucky to have these choices 😉
Anna
Awesome post! Choosing the right destination that too in a budget is really a big question. I totally agree with your views and experience.
amber
this post was awesome
I’m looking to go to Thailand for one week in December. I’m a preschool teacher, so I’m limited to taking long trips during winter break. Do you all think going possibly December 19th – 26th would be a good idea?
If not, could you suggest other destinations? I’ve been to Australia, and Japan before. So I would like to go somewhere I’ve never been yet.
NomadicMatt
Yes go!
Billy
I don’t really have that problem, mostly because I have a pretty good idea of where I want to go and where I want to go next, and then next, etc. My concern is that I’m running out of time! I’m 53, and there are dozens of trips I want to take. I’m afraid I won’t get to them all.
Lorrie Beno
Such good timing for this article Matt, thanks. Here I sit in Geneva with 20 days to fill in and not knowing which way to go. Poor me, lol. The article made me sit down and think about what did I really want to do. I’m heading for Italy. Reservation for a scooter (one of my favorite ways to get around) and I signed up for cooking class. I am so excited. Life is great! Next time I get down to Austin, I’ll come cook for your Hostel.
I am a 60 yo solo female traveler and I am loving the freedom. Do you have any solo senior bloggers to recommend?
Thanks again Matt, xoxo, be safe
Lorrie
Kristen
This kind of thing hits me in so many aspects of my life — not just travel. But your advice really helps. I usually choose my next trip based on who wants to travel and where they are going. I think my next trip will have to be something I arrange all by myself and ask someone else to come along with me!
But where to go…. 😉
David
One of the things I do when it comes to travel choices is to use various interests to develop lists of places I would like to see. I am not talking about liking the tropics or beaches although that works to, but go see places that are specific to a hobby or passion. If you like baseball, try to see as many historic stadiums or baseball museums as you can. Since I was five (I’m 60 now) I have loved spooky, ghostly and haunted historical places. So, I use that as a map to stop at places like Gettysburg or Alcatraz, etc. I find it takes me to places I wouldn’t normally consider but I always discover really cool things in each city or region. My last trip, I combined interests and did ghost walks in Hawaii. Perfect.
Alex Johnson
Hi Matt,
I think this is a great piece on ‘choice overload’, I find that it applies not only to choosing a travel destination. But many other things in life. I think the tips you give can be used in most’choice overload’ situations.
Great stuff!
Peter Watson
Nice problem to have! 🙂
Leela
I just came across this dilemma, I have been travelling in SE Asia for months, decided to go to Australia to work and replenish some funds, decided not to do the required farm work to get a second year visa to stay but I am regretting it. Instead I decided to come to Melbourne, which I’m now not sure is for me, to save more money and go toNew Zealand. I’m just fearfull I made the wrong decision but I need to give things a chance and stick with my choice.
Sara
This is me right now, I’m 19 and planning on going away this november to either Vietnam or the Philippines… but need to go to Chile in February to see family and really want to visit Kazakhstan as well… ARGH!! Can only afford Chile and 1 other.. that’s it and it’s really killin me!